The writer’s strike isn’t so bad

I realise that the writer’s strike is doing real damage on a lot of things economically. TV producers are freaking out as they can’t afford their one hundred billion hooker a night and TV stations are most likely losing many viewers by playing repeats. People don’t want old stuff; they want the new stuff! But I have seen the positive side of this. What is needed is a neutral party. Someone new in the scene, and this is where I come in. Using my super-manipulating powers, I can get them to write out my story ideas, the ones which the producers oh-so-mistakenly denied.

1. The Story of My Two Shoes
I have mentioned this story a few times in some people’s blogs, but have never got to reveal the full story of this. So basically, this is the story of a guy called Michael Two-Shoes, and he has shoes which talk to each other. Throughout each episode, we get to hear these stories, which are basically rip-offs from the most popular shoes today, like Heroes, Bionic Woman, Law and Order. Those kind of hard hitting shows. Though one original story consists of the guy wearing the shoes. He spills his grape flavoured Kool-Aid and the cleaner yells at him for doing so, especially in the office.

2. My Life As a Paranoid Weird-Ass
These story lines really don’t have the right to be called stories. In this show, everything and absolutely everyone goes nowhere, leaving viewers in a confused state. This is the magic of the show: making everything so confusing will bring viewers back in, seeing as the majority of viewers are brainless zombies. The title shows, as it has no relation to the show whatsoever.

3. Gollum – My Life As a DJ
This title is the same as the previous, but this one actually has some kind of sense in it. This show is about Gollum as a DJ, and how he rose to the top by mixing his greatest hits. Just as a taste, here are some of his most popular songs featured: My Precioussssss (The Gollum Remix), My Rings Around Lordi which includes samples of Lordi songs in it, and Hairy Feet Are Cool.

Three is a good enough number, but I don’t think this shows the real amount of talent I have for writing. Those TV producers must be kicking themselves now!

oh liek woaw

I did a small comic strip some months ago when I was really into web comics, and I found one I did a while ago:

WOOOOO FORMAL NIGHT!

For the Americans, this would be otherwise known as prom night.

So, anyway, last night (November 15th) was formal night. As usual, I looked the best because I’m just that kind of awesome person. I was so hungry as I only had some Twisties during that day, so I really needed a good meal. The food was good, but for some reason, I was like, “I’m too lazy to eat this” and I ended up not being hungry.

But the thing I wanted to talk about was the DJ, as I have mixed feelings about how good he actually was behind the turntable. So at first, he played some reasonable music. It’s definitely not what I would listen to, but still, I worked with it and was able to look really cool on the dance floor (I killed everyone with my robot moves). However, this DJ was one of those “new age DJs”, where they play their songs mixed together. I’m fine with this, but I really do miss the old days where DJs would play a song without mixing it together, and actually play older stuff too. Also, him being a new-age DJ, he really misses the point of good ol’ 80s music. I for one love 80s music, and I have lots of fun dancing to it. Even people who don’t like 80s music know that people who do like 80s music can have some serious fun with it.

So I requested 80s music, but I don’t think he heard me as he brushed me off. Okay, so my friends went up and requested it, and he seemed to hear them better. We did finally get our 80s music, but it was two Michael Jackson songs and that was it. I was soooo pissed. So where was the Duran Duran, Blondie, Cyndi Lauper, Hall and Oates? They were no where to be heard. So really, I am sick of these new age DJs, because they do not know a thing about letting people having fun. DJs these days seemed too concerned with themselves and what they want to hear, rather than what the people want to hear. I mean, there were teachers at our formal; wouldn’t he consider playing some old stuff for them? Obviously not, because he looked to be in his early 20s so straight from the beginning I knew he wasn’t going to play old stuff.

Other than the annoying DJ, it was pretty fun as I got to say proper goodbyes to the people who treated be nicely during school, and I thought it was only fair to give them proper goodbyes as at first I didn’t consider going to the formal. I’ll post some photos later. If my friends upload them, that is. Gosh, they’re bloody lazy.

Soundtrack for this generation

Now, I wouldn’t really be typing out a soundtrack for this generation because that’s just stupid. I’m not even going to bother because one, it would be a waste of time and two, I’d kill myself if I ever did. However, if I ever did do an introduction, it would go something like this. Note that I’m doing a local/indie version of it, as I would have very few bands that I like from the mainstream world. So here we go:

[Some radio theme song music in the background, with an over-enthusiastic voice]

Hi, I’m DJ WendySkeleton, and I am the new representation of the new frontier in music and just bad hair like people had in the 80s. But what can we call it? Hipster music. Of course, it is a look, but it’s also an excuse to wear really, really, and I mean really tight skinny-jeans. Do we look like guys, or do we look like girls? Or are we just a bunch of figments of imagination of a dung beetle slaved to really bad hairdos? Or are we really just pink and purple dots stuck in a black hole? I don’t know. And I sincerely doubt that the majority of the world does. People who don’t understand, I warn you that your Apocalypse begins now.

People that don’t understand this, I recommend conforming now. I now know that we are a bunch of 17 to 25 androgynous, deeply confused, pseudo-individual year old conformists, and that is why I have teamed up with Tight Jeans 58.7 to provide such a soundtrack for the people who fight so badly to be heard but realise that they are stuck in a rut because of their title “indie”, so bad that they might burn a house down. This isn’t a soundtrack anymore, this is a manifesto coup de grâce of today’s generation, our movement.

[A different radio theme song plays, with a female voice this time, slightly shouting and over-enthusiastic voice along with the music]

Tight Jeans 58.7, where guys wear tighter jeans than the girls!

And there you go.