I’m going to do a set of “game diaries”, that is, I play a game and I document my aimless exploits, and I’m doing it through the game The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind. And so we begin!
I wake up at the back of a ship that stinks of moldy wood. There’s some shirtless elf standing there. And apparently I was stuck in prison too. Maybe this elf was my gay lover? I’m not sure. He asks me my name, which I find a bit odd, seeing as we’ve been on this ship for a while together. Being stuck at the back of a ship that stinks of moldy wood, I’m not too keen on answering him, so I give him the smart answer.
You're ugly.
He seemed content enough, even though he kept staring at me. Awkward… maybe I shouldn’t have lead him on that night… Thankfully, the guard comes by and calls me up onto deck, where they thought I was important enough to be greeted by Morgan Freeman.
Hey, nice to see ya Morg.
Hell yeahs, this is what I call travelling in style.
After being asked to be go into another room where I finally tell a strange bald man where he asks me what my skills are, what my profession is and what my star-sign is. Oh jeez, this isn’t speed dating. I tell him my name is… LADY GAGA!
What kind of name is that? You need to get out more.
Once I take my papers to finally get permission to the dangerous world of Morrowind, I get escorted through a door to a small room, where they have a table set out for me and everything. Aw, how sweet! Or… I had other ideas. You just have to love how the law works here. Here I am, a convicted criminal being released into the world, and they put me in a room full of loose valuables, like silver plating, this strange liquid that is worth quite a lot. I even steal the piece of paper on the table. Ah, sweet loot.
Mmm, my precious
So I’ve finally made my way out towards the world, where I am finally free. I sell all my loot at the local trader and make my way out of here. Upon travelling, I stumble across some nekkid guy lying on the floor. I poke him with my short dagger which I stole from the previous room. He’s not moving. Yeah, okay, I lied. This is the true story, as farfetched as it sounds: while walking along, a wizard falls out of the sky. His hat looks intriguing to me, so I steal it from him. And I thought I may as well take his robe and his fancy shoes as well. What? He’s not going to be wearing it any time soon. I put it on, and miraculously, it fits me perfectly!
Nekkid face plant.
The blue in the robe brings out my eyes.
I look happy, don’t I?
1 response so far ↓
LuLi // September 29, 2009 at 12:11 am |
I started playing Oblivion a few weeks ago! But the xbox got red-ringed and now I am without
My girl was named Xiaoyu. She was a super awesome mage.